A Scottish study found that having more friends on Facebook led to more stress. "Scotland: Home of the Downer."
U.S. federal mediators have joined the negotiations between NHL owners and players. They're replacing the Canadian Mounties.
It turns out that musician Andrew W.K. will not be serving as a cultural ambassador to Bahrain. Apparently we just wanted to scare them.
Boeing announced that more work is needed before unveiling their new stretch 787 jet. Most notably, they haven't figured out how to put spinners on the wheels.
In British Columbia, an elderly couple fended off an attack from the most humiliated bear in history.
Chrysler is debuting a new "glam" version of their classic Town & Country minivan. Good news, the vehicle also serves as birth control.
Medical tourism is booming in Costa Rica. It's especially popular with people who said they needed another trip to Disney World like they needed a hole in the head.
And finally, shredded but still readable documents from the NYPD wound up in confetti used at the Macy's parade in New York City. "This is the second most embarrassing moment in NYPD history," said the cop arrested for planning to kidnap and eat women.
End.
Showing posts with label nhl. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nhl. Show all posts
Monday, November 26, 2012
Monday, October 1, 2012
Tuesday Morning Monologue - October 2, 2012
Let's make this fast and weird.
Anyone following the Iranian financial markets? What a roller coaster! The rial fell 18% on Monday, to a new record low against the U.S. dollar. Iranian analysts are blaming the country's currency problems on a combination of fluctuating oil prices, increased sanctions and Jews.
In Missouri, Rep. Todd Akin said this week that employers should be allowed to pay women less than men. He then went on to say, "no, I've never heard of the 19th amendment."
But if he's serious about cutting spending, shouldn't Congress be 100% women? We'd save a fortune in salaries.
A new safety report found that Amtrak employees are failing drug tests more often than in previous years, which must mean that Amtrak employees got a raise.
The NHL lockout is still continuing, in case you were wondering.
The Compact Disc turned 30 years old this week. Incidentally, 30 years old is the youngest age of anyone who still buys CDs.
A recent medical study found that children's cognitive development may be harmed by exposure to "secondhand" television. Especially if it's Whitney.
Hotel Transylvania opened at number one in the American box office this weekend, bringing in $43 million and proving that American's can't be trusted with money.
And finally, Kodak announced it will no longer be selling inkjet printers. Instead, they'll be focusing on products that don't irritate the shit out of people.
That's all!
Anyone following the Iranian financial markets? What a roller coaster! The rial fell 18% on Monday, to a new record low against the U.S. dollar. Iranian analysts are blaming the country's currency problems on a combination of fluctuating oil prices, increased sanctions and Jews.
In Missouri, Rep. Todd Akin said this week that employers should be allowed to pay women less than men. He then went on to say, "no, I've never heard of the 19th amendment."
But if he's serious about cutting spending, shouldn't Congress be 100% women? We'd save a fortune in salaries.
A new safety report found that Amtrak employees are failing drug tests more often than in previous years, which must mean that Amtrak employees got a raise.
The NHL lockout is still continuing, in case you were wondering.
The Compact Disc turned 30 years old this week. Incidentally, 30 years old is the youngest age of anyone who still buys CDs.
A recent medical study found that children's cognitive development may be harmed by exposure to "secondhand" television. Especially if it's Whitney.
Hotel Transylvania opened at number one in the American box office this weekend, bringing in $43 million and proving that American's can't be trusted with money.
And finally, Kodak announced it will no longer be selling inkjet printers. Instead, they'll be focusing on products that don't irritate the shit out of people.
That's all!
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Monday Morning Monologue - September 17, 2012
Good morning, y'all.
In Greece, two video game makers were arrested on spying charges after taking photographs of military installations. They're now planning to turn the experience into a new game, "Extreme Waterboarding 3D."
In Zimbabwe, a Swiss tourist was fined for insulting President Mugabe. Jeffrey Ross has cancelled his tour.
In television news, Dr. Phil recently called Dina Lohan "phony" before also telling her she was balding, had a stupid moustache and her medical credentials were dubious at best.
The NHL lockout deadline passed this weekend with no deal, leaving at least a dozen fans distraught.
In England, the royal family is taking to the courts to try and stop the spread of topless photos of Kate Middleton because that's how the Internet works.
In China, anti-Japanese protests are spreading across the country. Damn, even their bigotry is more efficient than ours.
In better news, poverty level dropped slightly last month. Gov. Romney congratulated the newly not poor on finally earning their first million dollar paychecks.
And finally, the Boy Scouts of America came under fire this week when the Los Angeles Times reported the organization has helped hide the presence of child molesters in the organization since 1903. The first clue: the Help Hide A Pedophile merit badge.
We are at an end. Till tomorrow!
In Greece, two video game makers were arrested on spying charges after taking photographs of military installations. They're now planning to turn the experience into a new game, "Extreme Waterboarding 3D."
In Zimbabwe, a Swiss tourist was fined for insulting President Mugabe. Jeffrey Ross has cancelled his tour.
In television news, Dr. Phil recently called Dina Lohan "phony" before also telling her she was balding, had a stupid moustache and her medical credentials were dubious at best.
The NHL lockout deadline passed this weekend with no deal, leaving at least a dozen fans distraught.
In England, the royal family is taking to the courts to try and stop the spread of topless photos of Kate Middleton because that's how the Internet works.
In China, anti-Japanese protests are spreading across the country. Damn, even their bigotry is more efficient than ours.
In better news, poverty level dropped slightly last month. Gov. Romney congratulated the newly not poor on finally earning their first million dollar paychecks.
And finally, the Boy Scouts of America came under fire this week when the Los Angeles Times reported the organization has helped hide the presence of child molesters in the organization since 1903. The first clue: the Help Hide A Pedophile merit badge.
We are at an end. Till tomorrow!
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