Hey friends! This week I broke all my previous records on Tetris. I welcome all challengers to friend me on Facebook and play me on Tetris. I will most likely kick the crap out of you and make it so you can't look your father in the eyes. How bout some jokes?
The head of the Libyan rebels, says he is “disappointed” in NATO for doing too little to protect civilians. To which NATO replied, "Well, when we saw what these people were fighting for, we realized that Libya is a dump. I'm not going to take a bullet for a turd farmer."
Speaking of Libya, NATO officials have accused Libya's army of using human shields in the besieged town of Misrata. NATO officials said, "The situation is worse than we thought. Libya seems to have the technology to animate regular old shield into some kind of human/cyborg shield thingy."An aide then whispered into his ear and the press conference concluded.
Who was the woman behind da Vinci's enigmatic Mona Lisa? Italian researchers say they may soon know: They have discovered the burial place of Lisa Gherardini, the wife of a rich silk merchant who is thought to be the model for the famous painting. But upon closer inspection it was revealed that it was just Leonardo DiVinci in drag. Well played DiVinci. Well played.
Sean Hayes, star of Will & Grace, will take on the role of Larry in the Farrelly Brothers’ reboot of the classic comedy trio, The Three Stooges. Which means the movie will be 33% gayer than any of the originals. And yes, I'm including, "The Three Stooges Go to Prison" in my assessment.
Workers at Japan’s stricken nuclear power plants have begun releasing about 11,500 tons of radioactive water into the sea in order to make room in storage tanks for more severely contaminated water. Someone needs to tell Japan that Godzilla won't be able to save them from whatever sea monster they are creating.
McDonald’s announced Monday that it will hire 50,000 new employees this month—all on one day. Unfortunately, Grimmace will have to re-take a drug test before he can get his job back.
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