In sports, Tim Tebow led the Denver Broncos to playoff victory against the Pittsburgh Steelers, proving once again that God loves Tim Tebow more than rape.
Filmmaker Tom Hanks announced that his new Web series will be available for streaming on Yahoo.com. It's part of a plan to make sure as few people see it as possible (NBC was not available, apparently).
The New York City Opera is now on a lockout, just like the NBA experienced recently except for who gives a shit about the opera?
Think you hate America? Think again. MTV announced they would be airing the reality program Caged, about cage fighting. It's like Fight Club, except the acting is far worse.
Speaking of movies, the people behind the Oscars are now proposing that documentaries must be reviewed by New York Times or Los Angeles Times in order to be eligible for an Academy Award. Said one organizer, "we're just so sick of watching documentaries."
Keifer Sutherland was out promoting his new program, Touch, and said that it was not an effort to bury Jack Bauer, which is good news because we'd all hate to see Keifer Sutherland get murdered by Jack Bauer.
In celebrity wedding news, Sinead O'Connor said this weekend that she is actually still married, and who gives a shit?
And finally, Papa John's Pizza apologizes for an anti-asian racial slur printed on one of its receipts. A spokesman for the pizza chain said that Papa John's means no disrespect to asian cultures. Just Italian.
Okay, that's all! More tomorrow, I bet. Till then, have a great day?
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