Let's get serious. Right after this.
In Missouri, concern is growing that Rep. Todd Akin will succeed in taking Sen. Claire McCaskill's senate seat. But the thing you need to realize is that in "legitimate elections" the body politic has a means of shutting that whole thing down. Fingers crossed.
Google Wallet is coming to MetroPCS, so now you won't need to sign a contract to have your identity stolen.
In gyms around the country, drumming is becoming the hot new full-body workout. It's especially popular with people who are extremely annoying.
Speaking of annoying, NBC is somehow leading in television ratings this season. But don't worry, Whitney will premier soon enough.
In the UK, a dentist was told to remove old magazines from the waiting room because they posed an infection risk. Also, patients were asked to stop blowing their noses in the magazines.
Photos of Fidel Castro surfaced, purporting to show that the ageless dictator is still alive. It should be noted, though that in the pictures he was wearing super-dark sunglasses and seen hanging out with Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman.
In all seriousness, Fidel Castro still alive, and has promised the people of Cuba that even if he does pass away, they will still continue to be repressed.
And finally, police in Kuwait were accused of excessive force for firing teargas at protesters. It could have been worse, though. Their first plan was to send out Joe Biden.
Serious it up, yo!
It's over. I'm not watching Whitney any more. I told you!
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