Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Thursday Morning Monologue - August 23, 2012

Twenty-three-skidoo! Have some jokes, my friends.

A recent medical study found "drinking alcohol while pregnant has long-lasting effects in children." It's also a problem for adults.

In Michigan, a fleet of talking smart cars are taking to the city streets. They tried it in New Jersey, but the cars wouldn't stop swearing.

Logitech unveiled a washable computer keyboard, which is great for... you know. Whatever. It's just great.

Missouri douchebag Todd Aikin said he is staying in the race because of his faith. Makes sense. God only knows why anyone would support him now.

Danish wind turbine firm Vestas cut 1,400 jobs, due to the market sucking. They really needed it to blow.

Korean rapper Psy is finding fame on the Internet thanks to a viral video of his horse-riding dance. Ann Romney is already attempting to purchase him for the 2016 Olympics.

Ecuador's volcano Tungurahua continues to spew lava and rocks, as American tourists in Ecuador continue to spew tequila on the rocks.

And finally, Minnesota state representative Gauthier dropped out of his upcoming race due to his recent sex scandal. A distraught Gauthier said he really wished he'd done something forgivable like make crazy assertions about female biology.

Anyway, that's all. Till next time!

No comments:

Post a Comment

Chime in!