How are you this Friday? I hope you have weekend plans that include something you enjoy. It's your time, ya know. You should do what you want. I have pink eye, so don't touch me. Anycrap, let's get to the jokes!
Due to the bad economy, the Queen of England’s salary will be frozen for the next four years. Wanna know who else won't be getting paid by the government for four years? Herman Cain.
Speaking of Herman Cain, the formal presidential candidate visited Oklahoma. He promised that he would still be active in touching as many people as he could.
Free-agent slugger Albert Pujols will join the Los Angeles Angels on a 10-year contract worth at least $250 million, according to reports Thursday morning. In other news, Kim Kardashian is planning a Spring wedding.
"America's Next Top Model" crowned a winner Wednesday night in its all-stars cycle, but not before a shocking and largely unexplained disqualification of one of the final three contestants. Turns out 1-out-of-3 models is terrible in bed.
Mitt Romney picks fellow Michigan native Kid Rock's tune "Born Free" as his campaign theme song. Kid Rock, like Mitt, was "born free" of hepatitis, but got that later when they slept with Mormons.
Rick Perry has an ad saying he thinks kids should be able to "openly celebrate Christmas" at school. Good point, Governor Perry. Finally a solution to our country's debt!
In a recent poll, Mitt Romney is trailing Newt Gingrich w/ upper income & low income Republicans, but slightly ahead with women Newt's dumped on their deathbeds.
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