Happy Friday friends! I'm going to be honest, I've been in a funk lately. It's not so much depression as it is a shallow kiddie pool of shit. So, if these jokes aren't good, well, whatever. Not like you paid anything for it. Just realize that when I'm dead and gone, no one is going to give a shit about a some jokes I wrote Dec. 16th 2011. Have a great weekend!
Recently a report surfaced that alleges Victoria Secret is linked to child labor. In other news, Toddlers and Tiara's is in for some competition.
In Hollywood news, Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway have been cast for the motion picture Les Miserables. They should change the name to More Miserables!
Also, Tom Cruise is going to be starring in a new sci-fi film called, "All You Need is Kill." A Scientologist in a sci-fi movie? Crazy.
Time Magazine recently named, The Protestor as their Person of the Year. Don't like their decision? Write them a letter, congrats you are now Times Person of the Year.
San Fransisco is gearing up for its annual "SantaCon." A convention for people that love Santa without the stigma of NAMBLA.
President Obama ended the war in Iraq. Does Bush still have that "Mission Accomplished" banner?
The National Transportation Safety Board called for a ban on all cell phone use by drivers. Unless you are also high on cocaine, because you can do anything when you're on cocaine!
More than one in three women have experienced sexual assault, physical violence or stalking by an intimate partner during their lifetime, according to a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention survey. In other news, perhaps the feminist movement was a mistake.
Staff Sergeant Steven Guidry's widow finally receives World War II service medals he earned more than 60 years ago. That's a nice surprise. Not as nice as the nice form letter she received when he died, but nice nonetheless.
Alright kids, thank you for hanging out. I love you.
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