Following his recent sexting scandal, Anthony Weiner has fallen to fourth place in the New York mayoral race, just ahead of Bill Clinton's penis.
On the subject of gay clergy, Pope Francis said "who am I to judge?" So, he didn't read the job description.
A new study links monogamy to increased IQ scores for men, according to the latest issue of the New England Journal of Nagging. Am I right?
Fast food industry workers are going on strike for a living wage. Best of luck to them, and we hope the nation can adjust to a day without diarrhea.
Scientists have succeeded in growing new, replacement teeth from human urine. So, you'll want to brush those teeth before you use them.
Archaeologists discovered that ancient Inca priests would use drugs to make children more docile when sacrificing them in religious rights. This just in: Roman Polanski is an Inca.
Tropical Depression Flossie is weakening after reaching Hawaii, leading to speculation that it had some poi.
And finally, the American Academy of Pediatrics found that candy is the number one cause of choking in children. And "a chance at the post-season" is still the number one cause of choking for the Chicago Cubs.
Ta-ta for now!
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