Happy Thursday to all you Gregorian calendar-aficionados! Let's see what's funny.
Lindsay Lohan is going back to host Saturday Night Live for the fourth time this Saturday, because nothing goes better with new-found sobriety than a week at SNL. Sorry to be a downer.
And sad news out of the music world, as we will have to stage another Grammy Awards ceremony for Davey Jones.
In clothing news, the Navajo Nation is suing Urban Outfitters for misappropriating their tribal identity for a use in a clothing line. No word yet if similar legal action is forthcoming from the Grand Duchy of Douche.
A man seized at the Cairo airport turned out to not, I repeat NOT, be al Qaeda leader Saif al-Adel. However, the man is now questioning the wisdom of a career as a Saif al-Adel impersonator.
This week, Yahoo! reported that Reese Witherspoon had a serious talk with her children about recognizing and preventing domestic violence. She then apparently had a serious talk with them about issuing press releases to Yahoo! to let the world know about every damn thing you do.
Fifteen Academy Awards were auctioned off for $3million this week. See, they're not worthless after all.
In Methuen, Massachusetts, school officials apologized this week for a mis-print in the school cafeteria which advertised "KKK Chicken Tenders." They quickly fixed the error and apologized to the community. However, they were oddly silent about the "Holocaust Never Happened Milkshake."
And, finally, scientists have succeeded in artificially growing human brain cells from families with a history of mental illness in order to study their abnormalities. There, kids. That's how you write a SyFy movie. Now we just need to add a shark...
Okay, that's it! Keep watching the skies!
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