Welcome back! Anything happen at the Emmy's? No? Okay, moving on.
In a recent poll, Apple was picked as the "coolest" brand in the UK, beating out the former champion, "Mr. Bean's Fantastic Dress Sock Garters." It's not a very cool place.
Speaking of Apple, a Foxconn factory building the iPhone 5 in China was shut down when 2000 workers rioted. Or, as Apple calls it, a fair level of excitement for the iPhone.
Speaking of the iPhone 5, since its release last week, it has sold 5 million copies, but sales numbers are still falling short of some analysts' expectations. In a related story, childhood sucks for the children of those analysts.
Celebrity umbra leach Dina Lohan said that she won't talk to Dr. Phil again, which is great news. That's just great news. For everyone.
Smartphone giant Samsung will be offering a pink version of the new Galaxy SIII in Korea. Apple responded by saying that they had previously patented both the color pink and Korea.
The CEO of Fiat denied rumors that they would be selling the Alfa Romeo brand, much to the disappointment of corporations having midlife crises.
Early voting has begun in this year's Presidential election for those who just couldn't wait to be disappointed.
And finally, former Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert faces prison time and a $190,000 fine in Israeli court for "breach of trust." Note to self: never cheat on an Israeli court.
Yep, that's how it's going out. Tomorrow!
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