Let's make jokes to deal with our feelings of frustration and helplessness at the modern problems we are beset by. Joy!
Science news up first. Doctors found that "sexting" among teens is leading to riskier sexual choices by young people. On the other hand, now kids have a reason to learn to read.
In other medical news, the CDC says that kids are eating too much salt, leading to higher blood pressure among children. It's also why kids today who "play doctor" are actually prescribing meds for hypertension.
Chris Brown's probation hearing for his 2009 assault on Rihanna has been pushed back again. Sure would hate to be the one to have to tell him.
Because he'd probably get real angry and choke me.
Apple's stock hit $700 for the first time. In other words, that's two iPhones. Incidentally, the stock certificates handle Flash content just as well as the phones.
In New York, airport workers are accused of stealing 100,000 tiny bottles of liquor. Authorities think they were planning the world's largest little party.
Newsweek magazine came under fire for a recent cover on "Muslim rage." Apparently the Muslims in question are subscribers. I'd be pissed, too, if I paid for that crap.
Dave Matthews Band released an album this month called "Something You Can Talk About When You Have To Make Small Talk With Your Dealer."
And finally, in leaked videos, Gov. Romney said that 47% of voters see themselves as victims. I didn't realize that many people worked for companies bought by Bain.
That's the end.
Or they were making the world's tiniest speakeasy. Think of the adorable little bathtubs for the gin!
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