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Yesterday was Talk Like a Pirate Day, and Krispy Kreme Donuts celebrated by giving free donuts to anyone who came into the store and talked like a pirate. So, congratulations, Krispy Kreme employees, on what was most definitely a day that wasn't annoying as Hell.
Chick-Fil-A announced it will no longer be donating to anti-gay groups, as they finally realized how hypocritical it was for them to denounce people for loving cock.
Cock is a male chicken.
Archaeologists believe they may have found an ancient scrap of papyrus in which Jesus refers to his wife. Although it is possible that He was just setting up the earliest mother-in-law joke on record.
Two BATF officials have stepped down over their handling of the "Fast and Furious" investigation. Ironically, no one has yet to be fired over the original Fast and Furious.
Congress united yesterday to pay tribute to Burmese democracy activist Aung San Suu Kyi. Said one member of Congress, "it's weird to see someone that dedicated to democracy."
In Chicago, the teachers union has reached a tentative agreement to end the strike and get teachers back to work. The mayor is pleased, union officials are pleased, but no one is happier than the members of the Bully Union.
Olympic snowboarder Shaun White was arrested recently for vandalism in a hotel lobby. The arrest was ovreturned, however, when he tested positive for performance enhancing drugs.
And finally, Edvard Munch's classic work, "The Scream" is coming to New York's Museum of Modern Art. While on display in New York, it will be re-titled "What the Hell are You Lookin' At?"
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