Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Thursday Morning Monologue - May 3, 2012

How about some Thursday? Drink it in...

The president of the popular microblog Tumblr resigned this week. Unfortunately, his resignation was reblogged so many times, the unemployment rate went up another 2%.

Blind Chinese dissident Chen Guangcheng accidentally left the U.S. Embassy yesterday while trying to find a bathroom.

North Korean GPS jamming signals interfered with South Korean flights this week, despite the fact that the captain had turned on the "NO GPS Jamming" sign.

This month, France is celebrating the 600th birthday of Joan of Arc with bonfires across the country.

In the U.K., the Ministry Of Defense is preparing for the upcoming Olympics by installing surface-to-air missiles on apartment building around London to protect the events and to facilitate "the most badass triathalon in history."

Edvard Munsch's "Scream" sold at auction yesterday for $120 million, making it the most expensive piece of Home Alone tribute art in the world.

In North Carolina, Cate Edwards left John Edwards' trial in tears when it was revealed that her father is, in fact, John Edwards.

And finally, a new medical study reveals that Taser shots to chest can cause heart attacks, according to world-renowned cardiologist Dr. Obvious.

If you made it through that, I commend you. Come back tomorrow for the multimedia extravaganza.

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