Let's go international, why don't we? Yesterday the King of Jordan, when asked about Syrian president Bashar's recent crackdown on his people, said "I would step down." He then added, "but I'm also not a paranoid psychotic, so take that with a grain of salt."
The NBA players association rejected the league's most recent contract offer and threatened to disband the players' union. Wow. It's a good thing they all got solid college educations so they can find a fallback career. Or at least go to the Occupy Wall Street protests and complain about not having jobs.
Jersey Shore star JWOWW tweeted this weekend that she was singled out unfairly for extra inspection by TSA agents on a recent trip. She was upset by the unnecessary pat down, mainly because she was neither drunk nor at the club when it happened.
Speaking of cultural touchstones, a literary museum is raising money to purchase and publish a "lost" manuscript by Charlotte Bronte. In a related story, high school English students are raising money to purchase and burn the same manuscript.
A survey found that one-third of American adults have ended a relationship through Facebook, text messaging and email, which means we need to be more clear about the meaning of the word "adult."
Speaking of crappy adults, former Penn State albatross Jerry Sandusky said yesterday that he is not a pedophile, but admitted to showering with young boys. In a related story, Jerry Sandusky may not know what the word "pedophile" actually means.
In European news, the new Greek Prime Minister Lucas Papademos says the country can be saved, but needs to implement a new economic program that will improve competitiveness. So, to sum up: Greece *can* be saved, but it *won't* be saved. Good try, L-Pap.
And finally, recent polling revealed that Newt Gingrich is tied with Mitt Romney for the lead in the Republican presidential primary! In a related story, that one vein on Romney's head keeps getting bigger.
Well, that's all. Until tomorrow, that is. And until then, have a great day!
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